Skeletons
by BeckyCSI
Summary: GSR Sara relives her childhood and Grissom tries to help, they go through the motions trying to keep each other afloat so to speak. ABANDONED STORY
1. New Beginnings

_**Summary: From continuation of 'Nesting Dolls' Sara has opened up to Grissom but what does this mean for their relationship. **_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters, I'm just borrowing them. I have updated this chapter, including the rest which will be following this one soon, then new chapters will be up. I told you i'd go over it at some point and that's what i'm doing. **_

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Fingerprints, DNA, fibres, hairs, shoeprints, blood spatter, cast-off and epithelial's, the same every day. It doesn't get boring though, it sometimes grabs more attention than other crime scenes. Mainly because however much a murder, a trick roll, a suicide or a B and E are the same as another, there is always another interesting story behind it. Hearing the reasons behind something like this or unravelling the story for yourself can be incredibly hard or just pure uneasy listening. Especially when you've had your own experiences.

Child abuse or domestic violence cases were the worst. More than likely not because it gave Sara the drive to close the case whilst blocking everyone else out, causing arguments and being determined to prove she can do this on her own but it was because she knew what it like, to be in that position, feeling the pain that they had gone through. Being a bystander of the crime scene took her back years and knew that this was going to be hard and it was going to tire her too easily. It was hard to walk that path alone but she did it and a little piece of her died every time.

Time's had changed, she let it go, let it spilled out to the one person that she was afraid of opening up to but it relieved her. Being held in the crook of Grissom's shoulder she poured her past out to him and the one reaction she didn't expect was him pulling her close and comforting her. Sara knew that this could be a turning point in their relationship but she didn't depend on it, she knew Grissom could pull himself away just as quick as he had come to her. For now though she lived with it and decided to enjoy the moment while it had lasted.

Sara had never put too much thought into her past mainly because she ended up with nightmares that could pass for the real thing and she thanked god for insomnia when it arrived. Although it was only a couple of hours sleep, she felt better than she had since she was twelve. After that traumatic night Sara recalled the voice saying _'everything is going to be okay'_ and the grip of the hand that led her away from her father's lifeless body. Everything was not okay though, it never was and would probably never be.

Sara had awoken lazily to find Grissom still there, stroking her hair absentmindedly. He hadn't left her yet. She felt grateful but didn't realise this would or could happen. Nothing had happened they just spoke and held each other in warm hugs whilst discussing their childhoods and whispering small words of reassurance making one another feel better. The subject grew lighter and they began talking about the first time they had met, then the emails they had shared while she was still working in San Francisco and how she had come to work in Las Vegas after Grissom asked for the favour during Holly Gribbs' case. He soon admitted that he had chosen her for the simple fact that he trusted her greatly and knew she would be an asset to his team, an asset to himself.

He loved to talk to her again like they had done in San Francisco, it made him feel lighter, more secluded to feeling as if they were the only two people on the planet. Grissom missed it, he missed her. Pouring his heart and soul out to Dr. Lurie proved easier than telling one of his closest friends but what scared him more than anything was that him a Lurie were more alike than he realised, than what any man would have wanted. Seeing Debbie Marlin caused him to re-evaluate their situation and put his reasons down to not willing to risk the job. This wasn't true, he knew there were loopholes, Grissom just wasn't sure if he'd be the man Sara thought he was. Truth be told, he was afraid of opening up to her.

Looking over it, being emotionally involved like that was stupid. He dismissed the thoughts of one day being with her, loving her. Talking was the closest they could come. They made each other feel better, that's all he needed but Sara always wanted more. She came to accept that. If she couldn't have him then settling for being close friends was fine. Grissom still wasn't sure.

Skeletons, that's what they were. Everything they had shared with each other that night was nothing but skeletons from their previously unopened closets. Something that was an occurrence for them, it was nothing new, only to discover that their feelings were more than alive. It was a dream that had awoken Grissom from his deep sleep; he shrugged it off, feeling the need to not wish it was true. He didn't need her, not in his head. Turning in his bed to stare at Sara's motionless and sleep fulfilled body. He didn't need her in his head, he had her right here.

TBC

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_**A/n: Updates Yey!! Whether you can notice them or not I don't know but I'm updating these current chapters to make it a little more relative to the new chapter that is currently nearly finished. Re-read, re-review do what you like but a little feedback would be cool, and just wait patiently for the new stuff :D**_


	2. Nightmares

_**Summary: What happens after 'Nesting Dolls'? My take on it, Sara has a nightmare causing Grissom to comfort her and they muse over past and current events.**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters used in this story I'm just loaning them :D I have no Beta so all mistakes are mine...all mine! Crap...lol updated!  
**_

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She sat there, staring at the wall. _'This is normal; all the kids at school go through this' _She thought. Tears had flooded her eyes and stained her cheeks. Her arm was throbbing and pain set in every time she took a breath in and a breath out. Her head was pounding and she could hear her dad making his way to her room. _'Oh no'_ She ran to her closet and hid behind the stacks of boxes and clothes left on the floor.

The door handle slowly turned and Sara was safely at the back of her closet, sniffles escaped her nose but before she could mute the sound, it was too late.

"Sara? I know you're in here." His voice was creepy almost; she could tell he was grinning. He wanted his fix before he lost even more control, this was no drug though, and he had the sick pleasure of beating his family. The one's he was supposed to love and care for.

Sara sat quietly hoping he would turn and walk out. No such luck in the Sidle household. The closet door flung open. The boxes and clothes were smashed against each other, revealing Sara shaking. Her eyes closed and tightened so much it began to hurt. He reached out and pulled at her sore arm nearly ripping it from the socket. She flew out of the closet trying to pull herself free. "Dad stop please!" Sara pleaded to be let go but he wasn't going to give up that easily. His hand rose above his head and before she could dodge it, a fist swung at her. It was so close to hitting her on the jaw but a scream had stifled the silence and she sat up wide awake in bed.

"Honey?" He could see the glimmer of light from the moisture running down her face.

"Shhhh come here, your okay, I'll look after you. Shhhh." Grissom pulled her close and wiped the tears from her eyes. "It was just a nightmare." Sara shifted closer and hid her face from Grissom's view in his shoulder.

He knew that their case had hit her hard; the only problem was that she refused to talk about it. If he couldn't comfort her by listening and reassuring her, then he'll comfort her when she needs him the most whether it's a nightmare or just a silent cry from the corner of the locker room. Grissom didn't want to force anything out of her. He was pretty sure she'd tell him in time.

Sara had awoken earlier than usual. She sat by the window in Grissom's townhouse staring at the busy streets of Las Vegas. _'No one really cares about the turmoil people face everyday; here it's just money and sex. I get to see it though, I know how people live.'_ A small creak from the floorboards made her jump, images flashed before her eyes after re-counting last nights 'episode'.

"What are you thinking?" His voice was so quiet and soothing, she almost didn't acknowledge it.

Waking to find him next to her was a great feeling. She always found solace in his arms and she never wanted to be let go, it was the first time in years she'd ever felt wanted, needed.

"Nothing. Do you want some coffee?" Sara closed her eyes in hope he wouldn't bring up last nights ordeal.

"Yeah please." A small smile erupted on his face. He took a few steps over to her and kissed her pale cheek. "Sara, about last night…"

"Grissom don't please." She pleaded.

"No listen, If you don't want to share with me what's been upsetting you lately then promise me you'll let me be here for you when you decide you want to share."

"It's nothing; I'm just having trouble sleeping." Grissom stepped in front of Sara and held her in his arms. "Please don't fuss. I'm fine."

"Okay but if you need to talk I'll always be here for you." Sara smiled and paced towards the kitchen followed only a few steps behind by Grissom. She filled two cups of coffee and handed one to him.

It was blatantly obvious that there was a little more to her sleepless nights than what she was letting on. He knew that if he tried to force her into sharing she would back away.

He couldn't imagine how painful her childhood was. He only knew little about it, she had only given him the basics. When she was growing up her father had beaten her family so much that Sara's mother had snapped and stabbed him. He knew that her mother was placed in a mental institute and her family was then split up, placing herself and her brother into adoption. Grissom never did know how she had coped with it, how she had felt, and her emotions. There was always something more to it than she had ever lead on.

Grissom grew up hardly knowing his father; he had mysteriously died in a chair after coming home from work one night. Gil was only nine. He lived with his deaf mother. He enjoyed using his hands to communicate with her, even if it did cause him to be bullied at school just because he was unusual.

High school came round incredibly slowly but when it had finally arrived, Grissom was relieved. He was a 'ghost.' Everyone just left him alone. The students would say it was because he wasn't worth knowing or he was just plain strange but he always thought it was because the kids feared his intelligence. Friends weren't really a necessity to him anyway. No one ever understood his way of learning, he was labelled a freak for performing autopsies on washed up, dead creatures found on the beach.

No one had ever understood him, he'd wondered through life being his own man, keeping himself to himself at least that was until he had met Sara for the first time.

_**TBC**_

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_**A/n: R&R for the sake of updating. New chapter is half way done, the rest are being updated as you read :D  
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	3. Maybe Memories

_**Summary: Sara talks about her past and her moving to Las Vegas. Grissom finds out from Catherine that Sara hasn't arrived for her shift. Where is she?**_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters used in this story I'm just loaning them :D I have no Beta so all mistakes are mine...all mine!**_

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They sat together on the tiny love seat, talking for hours. It was beginning to get a bit emotional for Sara but he didn't want to her stop, he wanted her to feel that she could open up to him and that he wouldn't back away. He was there for the long run. _'I'm not going to look back.' _

"When I got your call about the Holly Gribbs case, I thought it might be a turning point in my career…I…also wanted to see you again. Emails weren't exactly enough and I was lucky if you replied to all of them. Getting to see you outside of lectures would have been a change!" Sara grinned and took a quick glance at Grissom, he was looking at her in awe. She loved that look.

"I called you because I trusted you and I believed you'd be the best choice for an inside investigation. Warrick was my best CSI and I wanted to make sure he got the analysis he deserved, I wanted it to be fair. As soon as I was told, your name was the first that came into my head. That's why I called."

Grissom reached for her hand and squeezed her fingers loosely. Her skin was silky under his and he loved to memorise each contour that he could find on her body.

"When I finished the case, I knew I'd have to leave for San Francisco again. You asked me to stay and initially I was going to turn it down because I didn't want to leave my friends at the coroner's office back home, but then I realised that if I moved here I would be able to gain more from my career." Sara's eyes began to glaze over but she tried so hard to not let the tears run.

"So you weren't sure if you should stay? If staying here was for your career and you've told me before that you are as far as you can go, then why have you stayed since?" He began to worry, '_why did she stay? There are more opportunities outside of Vegas.'_Grissom knew she could move up in the ranks but she still chose to stay here.

"You." From that Sara began to cry and Gil pulled her towards his shoulder and cradled her head in his hands.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to realise." He could feel himself welling up at the thought of not sorting out his feelings sooner. He had noticed that he'd hurt her many times and he hated himself for it.

If she had moved away he wouldn't be feeling like this. He wouldn't have tasted the happiness he has now; he would just come home every day to be alone, even though he did enjoy his own company. It was only months before he thought it would be a mistake to further their relationship, he was glad he had gone against his own intuition and taken the risk. Gil felt more alive than he had done in years and it was all because of the amazing woman that lay in his arms.

He had to admit he'd also noticed a change in her, she wasn't spending so much time at work and she always had a smile plastered on her face. The nightmares she were having had subsided since she opened up to him a few nights ago. Grissom couldn't believe the problems she had gone through _'If only she'd come to me sooner. She would not have felt so alone at work during the toughest cases.'_ He did empathize with her and he now knew why she took the domestic abuse cases so much more seriously than the others. When she defended herself from the husband who had killed his wife a few years back, Gil instantly knew that she was troubled. _"I am a woman, and I have a gun. And look how he treated me. I can only imagine how he treated his wife."_ He always thought there was some story behind those words he just wasn't sure what, until now.

"You're here now aren't you? I just hope you're not going to shut off again." Her voice was just a small whimper now but he could understand what she meant.

"Believe me I'm not planning on going anywhere. Just don't freeze up on me when you remember something particularly painful, I want to be there for you, I want to help you." He placed a light kiss on her forehead and looked at her to continue talking.

"I don't want to scare you away. I find it hard to talk about certain things, just give me a little time."

"Whatever you want, Honey. I'll always be here." Sara looked up and smiled at him.

"You know when I first moved here everyone disliked me because you called me in rather than asking Catherine or Nick to do the investigation on Warrick. Then you offered me a permanent CSI position. I didn't really see you unless we were on a case together. So sometimes I needed to sort my head out. Driving around Vegas wasn't anything special so I took it further and found a place near red rock. It was beautiful. A large piece of land that over looked the Nevada desert and a cool air swept past every now and again. I could forget about everything and just relax. It was like my safe haven I guess."

"You'll have to take me there sometime." Grissom thought about spending sometime outside with her, keeping their relationship secret meant they were almost always at each others place without going out anywhere. "It would be nice to go out with you without having to spend time with corpses in the process!"

Sara let out a laugh and any trace of her crying was pretty much gone. "I'd love to show you it but right now I need to go get ready for work." She stood from the love seat and kissed Grissom.

"You can shower here you know!" He lifted one brow at her as if she'd lost her mind.

"I know but there are a few things I need to do back home. I'll see you at the lab."

With that she'd left and Grissom's townhouse had seemed empty again. Only having to wait a couple hours to see her again was playing at his nerves. He had become more attached to her than he had thought.

Gil stood and made his way to the shower. _'Only a couple of hours...'_ A smile crept onto his face as the thought ran in his head. _'It still feels like forever.'_

He was an hour late; traffic had lasted longer than usual, that is the worst thing about Las Vegas, the traffic. He had always loathed it. As he parked his Denali, Grissom quickened his steps towards the lab as Catherine wondered out.

"Where have you been?" She asked

"Traffic." He let out a huff then half shrugged and went to continue onwards when she stopped him.

"Have you seen Sara?" Worry was present in her voice and he instantly knew something was wrong.

"Not recently no. Why?"

"She didn't turn up for work and she's not answering any of our calls." Catherine waved her cell in his face and he took a step back trying to take in what she just said.

'_Please don't say I have anything to with this. I wasn't trying to push her.'_

"Okay, give me a second and we'll go round to her apartment." Grissom quickened his pace even more towards his office and took a look at his messages. _'None….Oh no.'_

_**TBC**_

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_**A/n: Updating like a crazy person :P lol There isn't really much I can change but anyway I'm going through all the chapters. I'm incredibly bored so this should be done soon and you can all get ready for the new stuff!**_


	4. My Standard Break From Life

_**Summary: Sara is taking some time to think over her life whilst Grissom is still trying to figure out where she had gone.  
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_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters used in this story I'm just loaning them :D I have no Beta so all mistakes are mine...all mine!  
**_

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The sun was just about to set, it wasn't often the large orange glow stayed up longer than it would normally but it was still amazing either way. The strip wasn't visible and no sounds were heard apart from wild animals that were in search for food before the nocturnal creatures would set in for their hunt.

She had never observed the slightly perceptible green glow that was said to appear just before the sun wasn't in view anymore, since she had arrived in Vegas anyway. It was unusual to see something so beautiful in a city built on artificial fluorescent lights, money and lies. It could soon chew you up and spit you out. Nothing had really got Sara's attention anymore, she had seen basically everything, whether it was ordinary or not but she soon realised that there was more to Las Vegas than she thought. It wasn't just the sites, through interrogations and reading through old case files she had learnt a lot about the history of 'Sin City'.

50…60…70…80, the speedometer crept upwards responsively and they had avoided any impossible traffic along the way, one of the perks of working on the nightshift. Grissom pulled into a parking spot and jumped out of the Denali. Catherine followed closely behind as they neared Sara's apartment door. He knew instinctively that she probably wasn't there as her car wasn't anywhere in sight but he still raised his clenched knuckles and knocked briskly. Anything was worth a try.

"SARA! SARA!" His voice was loud and a familiar figure appeared one row down at her neighbour's front door.

"Hello? Mr. Grissom, is that you?" Her hand was raised above her eyes as if the light from her house was going to blind her.

"Yeah it is, Hi. Have you seen Sara?"

"She came home a couple of hours ago then left a few minutes later but she hasn't appeared since. Why? Is something wrong?" Her hand dropped and stared at Catherine then glanced back at Grissom.

"No everything's fine I just need to speak to her. If you see her can you get her to give me a call please?"

"Yes of course. Bye Mr. Grissom." The elderly woman turned and entered her front room and locked the door, seconds later the lights went out too.

"How do you know her?" Catherine put on her best interrogation face but a smirk managed to make its way to her lips.

"I…I met her awhile back. Anyway have you tried Sara's cell again?"

"No, I'll try now." Catherine pulled out her phone and hit speed dial.

Grissom stood there curiously as she pulled 'A _what the hell is that' _Look. He soon realised what she was insinuating and pressed his ear to the door, the ringing of Sara's phone was coming from inside the apartment. Without perceiving what he had just done, Grissom pulled his set of keys that Sara had given him weeks ago and opened the door.

"You know what…I'm not even going to ask." Catherine shook her head and walked straight in. She found the location of Sara's cell and flipped it open.

_12 missed calls_.

"You two are in a relationship aren't you?" He was caught off guard and stammered before he found an appropriate retort.

"Er…I thought you said you weren't going to ask."

"Curiosity got the best of me…"

"That was quick!" His eyes widened at Catherine's response.

"You should know me by now Gil."

"Good point. Anyway can you see anything that might indicate where she is?"

They both searched her premises up and down. Nothing looked out of place and there was no indication that anything illegal had happened here. Grissom took a look over at her answering machine and the tiny light was flashing. He pushed the 'play' button and listened for the message to be played back.

'_Sara I know my last message came as a shock but it's hard to get hold of you these days. I need to know if you are going to come next week. Obviously it's the last place you'd want to be but it's still our mum. Please ring me as soon as you get this, love you loads big sis….beep.'_

'_Okay, now I'm beginning to piece this together. He doesn't sound happy and all her other messages have been wiped. I need to find her!' _

"You know Sara better than anyone, do you have any ideas what that could have been about?" Catherine's voice startled him out of his thoughts and he began to recall everything Sara had ever said him.

"Not precisely but I think I might have an idea. She could be somewhere to just think about whatever her brother had said and forgot to notify us. The trouble is where?"

This is the only way to see the stars in Sin city. They were usually faded out by the bright lights beaming from the casinos. Sara could pin point all the macroscopic constellations that were above her head and made her own conclusions of the stars that were left. Even the moon was full and it lit the area around which she sat. _'I can't believe this, when I get the courage to come here again it's on the worst terms.'_ Sara stood and paced a couple of steps forward. She slowly bent down and placed two red roses on the ground. She moved backwards and sat down again looking upwards facing the bright stars. '_After all that has happened these past few months, I never thought it would feel this amazing to be living again.' _ A smile grew on her face and she laid herself on the ground and closed her eyes. Sleep overwhelmed her body and she drifted off within a matter of minutes.

_TBC_

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A/n: I feel sick and tired, but the newest CSI episode cheered me up :P 'You Kill Me' was hilarious in my opinion especially when we saw what Hodges would look like if he was dead XD


	5. Meaning In Tragedy

_**Summary: Sara still hasn't been found until Grissom spends some time remembering everything they had said to each other in the mast few months.  
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_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters used in this story I'm just loaning them :D I have no Beta so all mistakes are mine...all mine!**_

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'_Good job Sara picked a slow night to go missing.'_ Grissom had spent the rest of his shift back at the lab thinking about where she could have gone to. _'I just hope she's okay.'_ He pinched the bridge of his nose and put his glasses back on. _'I should be out looking for her.' _Catherine had gone back to supervise the others while he waited by the phone. Hours had past and nothing had been heard, Sara was a smart woman if anything had happened there would have been some evidence of an altercation.

Taking every minute that had past as a sign that he probably wasn't the person she'd want to talk to. Maybe it was because she'd told him too much and thought that he wouldn't want to live with her demons or it could just be that she doesn't want to talk to anyone. Which ever decision she held he'd respect but it still wasn't going to make him feel better. Gil had come too far to just let her away slip now. They had spent weeks breaking down the walls each other had set up and every word spun around his head trying to figure out where she could be. This was killing him.

'_I didn't really see you unless we were on a case together.' _He couldn't believe that he really did mean that much to her. Being a kid in the middle of what her father and mother called a 'family' wasn't the full reason behind her pain but the way she was treated since she started work at the lab had contributed too. _'.. A place near red rock. It was beautiful. A large piece of land that over looked the Nevada desert and a cool air swept past every now and again. I could forget about everything and just relax. It was like my safe haven I guess_._'_ At least she had found a place to get her mind off things, even if it didn't work all the time. Even Grissom knew that holding in your feelings never worked, they always came back to bite you in the arse.

"Red rock!" He whispered the two significant words and stood from behind his desk. Before he knew it he was in the car park heading for the Denali. Kicking himself seemed like a good idea if it was possible, how he hadn't realised sooner was lost on him. From the lab, red rock was at least an hour away and Sara had never specified where exactly she used to go. His best bet was to keep a look out for her SUV.

The early rising sun set a warm ray on her face and she began to stir. Waking up from one of the best sleeps she'd engaged in for awhile brought a smile to her face until she had remembered the words of her brother that were left the previous evening on her answering machine. The roses she placed in front of her still laid crossed at the stems and a tear slipped down her cheek. Sara hadn't even registered that anyone from the lab would have wondered where she was but being found was the last thing on her mind.

Desert roads were the best to drive on, limited numbers of cars were in the way, only those there for rock climbing and he could drive at a fast speed. He pondered on where could be the most peaceful spot near Las Vegas but out of sight. His neck was sore from frantically looking around for her Denali. Not many people were around at the beginning of the day, it's too early and the sun is at it's hottest in a couple of hours anyway. It was amusing how she had such a tight grip on his heart and he hadn't even bothered to acknowledge it Thinking that something could have happened to her was the worst possible thought he could think and after finally coming to terms with the things he was feeling, he couldn't imagine life without her. Grissom knew that she could look after herself and she'd probably be fine, it still didn't stop his worry.

A couple of miles onwards and he spotted a glint in the midst of a cloud of sand. As it slowly cleared Sara's Denali appeared just ahead and he accelerated. Just the Denali, no Sara. Once he had reached it, he hopped out and took a look around the car. _Nothing._ Hoping for a set of foot prints that could possibly lead him to her were all he had. She wasn't in sight. There was a small, lone peak about a mile ahead and it was the only place that she could possibly be within the area. Luckily he had a couple bottles of water in his kit and he took them both, one for himself as he walked the short distance in the sun and one for Sara, if he finds her.

Sara had no will to leave at this minute, she just wanted to sit, think and feel everything around her. The slightest remark from a suspect in interrogation about how their family was so hard to cope with that they had just simply murdered them. It made her see red, it wasn't easy suppressing years of hurt. She needed a focus to vent her feelings. It was amazing how she hadn't flipped out on a suspect before.

He stood over ten feet away from her. She sat with her knees at her chest and arms wrapped around her legs. She looked peaceful. Relief rushed through him knowing that she was okay. Taking a few more steps beside her, he sat down and placed his arm around her shoulders. They didn't speak, he just handed her the bottle of water, smiled and continued his attempt to hug her. Continued his attempt to make her feel secure.

Seconds turned to minutes as they passed by. He could sense she wasn't emotionally alright. He was there though and she loved him for that.

_**TBC**_

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_**A/n: So I've revealed where she is. Still I'm not sure how this is going so review it please and tell me whether it's worth extending anymore. Each chapter seems to be going down hill, either that or it's because I'm watching Kickboxer XD but I'm not reading it how you guys are. Once chptr 6 has been reposted this fic is on hiatus until I can finish the new chapter, in advance I apologise for any late or slow pasts.. **_


	6. Something To Believe In

_**Summary: Grissom sat with Sara and waits for her to begin to open up again, he finds out why she felt the need to miss work. **_

_**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the CSI characters used in this story I'm just loaning them :D I have no Beta so all mistakes are mine...all mine!**_

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"How did you find me?" There was no emotion present in her voice but it was a start to get her talking again.

"I'm not going to lie, it took me awhile to realise but when I heard you didn't show up for work I started to worry. Me and Catherine went to your apartment and found your cell."

"You went to my apartment?" She looked up at him with her deep brown eyes.

"Well yeah about that...Erm…Catherine knows about us." He grinned sheepishly and Sara let out a small giggle.

"So we'll be getting an interrogation soon? I'm sorry I didn't call."

"It's okay, it would have been nice to where you were but as long as your okay."

"My brother rang…" Grissom interrupted her before she could finish the sentence.

"I know. He left another message and I sorta listened to it, he apologised for not saying whatever he had said on your answering machine over the phone and that he wanted to know if you're going next week, mind me asking what it was about?" Shock was plastered on her face, she couldn't believe he had simply invaded her privacy like that but she was too upset to begin an argument.

"My biological mother died a couple days ago, even though I now understand why she killed my dad, I'm not sure if I could face her funeral. There are too many bad memories and I'm in the middle of trying to sort them out. It's like taking a step forward then taking ten steps back."

He knew exactly what she meant. Grissom had figured it would be hard to attend something that would send Sara back into her spiralling circle, after all the conversations and secrets they shared he didn't want her to start becoming maniacal again. "I'm sorry, Honey. If you go I'll come with so you won't be alone, if you don't then I understand and everyone else will too. It's entirely up to you."

"Thanks." She turned and kissed him on the cheek and snuggled back to the rock and buried her head in his chest. He glanced forwards and noticed the two roses lying on the floor. Grissom knew that roses wouldn't grow around these parts of the desert and they certainly wouldn't lay crossed on the floor like that.

"Did you put them there?" He nodded his head towards them not realising that Sara wasn't paying attention to where he was signifying to.

"Yeah, as soon as I found out I decided I wasn't going to go to the funeral so in my own way I tried to find a place where I could pay my respects to her. This was somewhere that was special to me and I thought it would be acceptable."

"But there are two." A confused look spread across his face but still maintained the fact that they could both be for her mum and he was reading too much into it.

"One's for my dad. I know it may seem stupid, I hated him for everything he ever done to my mum and myself but it never changed the fact that he was my dad."

"That's not stupid, nothing you do is ever stupid to me." Their eyes locked and he smiled down and placed a kiss on her forehead.

"I'm glad you came, I really needed someone to talk to. A few months back I couldn't imagine being here today. You've really helped me."

She thought he'd never find away to pass the obstacles that faced them, all she ever wanted was to have a good career and sort their differences out. Grissom had just crashed straight through them, it took years to do but he's here now and that's what matters. Fears of him retreating and putting back up the wall around his heart were disintegrating as the days passed.

"I'll always be here for you remember that. Sara this may not be the most appropriate time but I...er…need to tell you something." This was one of the few times he had ever lost words to say but he desperately needed to tell her. Gil knew it was long overdue.

"Griss?" she pondered on what he could possibly say and judging by his tone of voice only bad things came to mind.

"Sara, I love you, I love you a lot." His words only just broke the sound barrier but the expression on Sara's face confirmed to him that she had heard them.

"I love you too." She smiled.

Things had started to look up. _Finally._

_**TBC**_

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_**A/n: Told you I was going to update it, well I haven't really done anything yet lol but yeah. New chapter shall be here soon, I'm just adding some finishing touches to it :D Thank you to every one who has previously reviewed. **_


	7. Past, Present And Future

_**Summary: **_Sara and Grissom meet with Jason, Sara's brother.

_**Spoilers: **_None.

_**Disclaimer: **_I could ask, plead, beg and cry to own CSI but it's really not going to happen so all my thought goes into writing these fics. Hopefully, one day a producer will love my stories and ask me to be a writer on the show...HA! Not beta'd all mistakes are mine.

**_A/N:_** I am majorly Peeved! I was planning on editing a fic I had more or less finished so I could publish and I can't find it! The name it should be under has a completely different story in it :( Not cool! Anyway, I'm going to try and wrap this up, I edited this real quickly and I'm gonna post a new chapter which should wrap it up.

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Sara wasn't as chirpy as she used to be since she found out her mother had passed on but her moods were slowly getting back on track, nothing much was really said after those three simple words had made their first appearance. Grissom accommodated himself to make sure he could understand her point of view. Trying not to overdo their new found relationship, he had only voiced his love when he felt she needed to be reminded. Of course she knew how he felt, she had done ever since the Marlin case although hearing him tell her made it more realistic.

He too, was subjected to losing a parent at a young age and his mothers growing deafness wasn't exactly something easy to cope with but knowing how traumatic Sara's young life must have been was all too well…scary. It wasn't time to lose his mind over how she could keep her cool, they had a funeral to attend and Grissom had to been strong for her.

Gil was clad in a black suit, with a white shirt and a black tie. Sara was wearing a simple black dress that he loved to see her wear, even though it wasn't a bright occasion.

"You ready for this?" They were sitting in the department Denali that the Sheriff had kindly let them borrow for the trip to Tamales Bay. Just a few feet away from the cemetery gates. Grissom had stayed staring at the road before him until he heard her reply.

"I've never been ready for it, I just have to wing it I guess." She let out a short burst of air and smiled.

"Okay, come on." He grabbed her hand and squeezed it just before he climbed out of the driver's side door, walking to the other side of the dormant vehicle he opened Sara's door and waited for her to get out.

They placed their hands in each other's and began to walk towards the church, from what Grissom could see there were only five other people standing around the large glass stained windowed doors. Taking his time studying them he soon came to the conclusion that four of them were pallbearers whilst the other lonely figure looked to be Sara's younger brother. Sara had made plans with him to have their mum cremated so they could spread her ashes into the sea.

She had told Gil once that before all the pain crept into their lives, her mum and dad would take herself and Jason down to the beach. If the weather weren't too bad they would have a small picnic and catch up on things that had happened at school. The one memory that Sara had told Grissom she loved to remember and it was the only one where she could see everyone together and happy.

Grissom's hand felt the cool breeze when he realised that Sara had let go and ran to the taller man, gripping him in a tight bear hug. "Jason! It's so good to see you again!"

"You too sis. Too bad it has to be like this." He smiled and returned the warm gesture but sadness glimmered in his eyes as Sara began to pull away.

She stood there for a minute trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to fall; she looked upwards and remembered Grissom standing awkwardly to the side. "Oh this is Gil. Gil, Jason." Sara waved her arm in between the two and grinned when Grissom extended his hand to her brother.

Jason met his half way a shook it suspiciously until he had made an opinion of the man. "Nice to finally meet you Jason." He let his arm drop back to his side and moved his other to resume its position in Sara's hand.

"Likewise. Shall we?"

Sara took a breath and began to walk through the tall doors. "Uhuh."

A few small flower arrangements were set around the casket, Gil had sympathy for Sara's mother, there were no other people sitting in the pews. Even though what she had done was wrong, he could still see the sense in it all. Laura Sidle was protecting her children even if it did mean taking a life and ruining her own at the same time.

The ceremony was relatively short and the vicar had offered his condolences and remaindered Sara and Jason that the ashes could be picked up tomorrow from the funeral directors. They walked out of the church, Grissom's arms resting tightly on Sara's shoulders, hoping to give her a little comfort. Jason followed by her side.

The younger man stopped and waited for the couple to follow his lead until he began to speak. "Sara, I'm leaving tonight so I can't come with you guys tomorrow. I know I said I'd stay but a last minute meeting came up, I asked if it could be rescheduled but apparently it's too important."

"It's okay, you were here today. Gil and me will spread the ashes. What time does your flight leave?" Sara was a little broken up, she hadn't laid eyes on her brother for a few years and now he was going to leave again.

"In a couple of hours, I've got to be in New York early tomorrow morning."

"Not enough time to grab some lunch before you pack then?"

"I'm afraid not. If you grab some time off though I'll come visit you guys in Vegas. I'm due for a vacation."

"You sound like us! That would be great." Grissom spoke up this time, trying to make sure Sara wasn't going to break down in front of them.

They exchanged a few pleasantries and hugs, then Jason had left the couple to sort out what they were going to do in the next few days. Grissom had told Sara that while they were away from the lab and Las Vegas they might as well make a vacation out of it. She had originally protested to the idea but he gently persuaded that it might be good to have some time to themselves, Sara reluctantly agreed.

_**TBC**_

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_**A/n2: **_Reviews will be greatly appreciated, once the last chapter is posted, I'll be on hiatus for awhile.


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